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One of the basic issues we need to understand is that parents and teens view school very differently. This is important because often we believe that our kids look at school the same way we do.

In many cases, nothing could be further from the truth.

For parents, we work and want to do well in our jobs. So we think because our kids don’t work full time or at all, then school is their full-time job, and they should want to excel.

For teens, as well as many younger kids, school is their social world interrupted by six to seven classes a day.

This different view is the cause for many dinner-table squabbles.

Every now and then, as parents describe the problems with grades, they will say, “We got a D in that class.”

I’ve thought of many responses to that statement, most of which I don’t share. What I do say is, “Excuse me, who is this we? Do you go to class or does your child?”

The point is that at some time – the earlier the better – school must become more important to your child than it is to you.

Having laid out these two basic principles, let’s look at some solutions for handling a less than exciting report card.

1) You’ll want to meet with the teacher of a class in which your child has done poorly. You should ask the teacher: What he thinks might be in the way of your child doing well in this subject; does she think your child has the tools to do well in this class; how are other kids of equal ability doing in this class; what does he recommend your child (notice, not we) do to improve in this class?

2) Learn how to read a report card. There is much more information there than just grades. There’s also conduct and attendance to check out. Look for patterns. If your kid got a good grade and great conduct in one class and poor grades and bad conduct in another, take a look at what the differences are between those two classes. Obviously, the child has the ability in one class. What’s in the way in the other?

3) Often kids will blame the teacher. “She doesn’t like me!” This is an opportunity to teach real-world living in which not all people, bosses included, are going to like you. At the same time, you still need to know how to do well in a situation, even when there are people who don’t like you.

4) Here’s a little trick of the trade: Determine which class comes right before your child’s lunch period. If grades, attendance and conduct are significantly different after lunch than before, the next question is what’s happening at lunch that is getting in the way?

5) Make two copies of your child’s report card _ one for you and one for your child. Draw a horizontal line to the right of each letter grade. Next to the end of that line, write the next letter grade up. For example, if the grade is an F, write a D. If it’s a D, write a C, and so on. These one-step-up grades are the goals for the next grading period.

This may sound like settling for less, but it really is not. It gives your child a manageable goal to reach. Over a couple of grading periods, this strategy can move low grades to high grades. If they go higher than the goal, then that’s a good thing. If they go lower than the goal, it’s time for some consequences.

6) It’s been my experience that grounding a kid for the entire grading period is in most cases counterproductive. For adults, nine weeks is not that long. For kids, however, it’s forever, and you get rapidly diminishing returns.

Instead, start with strong consequences, and then as effort, behavior and grades improve, let the rope out a little at a time, just enough for them to grow themselves.

It’s also useful to link grades to something that is important to them. As one father said to me last year, “In our family, Ds don’t drive.”

In some respects, you do not know what parenting is until your children hit their teens. It’s a whole new ball game. All of a sudden you realize that there is this huge gap between you and your kid and the more you try to fix it, the more it seems to broaden. Communication between you and your child seems to be dead. These are probably the toughest years!!

So what do you do to make it better?

Here are a few tips:

• Try and get into their heads. Do not assume that because you do not like something, your teen does not like it too.

• Remember to always be truthful to your teen. No matter how old your child grows, he/she looks at you as an example. If you want your teen to be truthful, you need to first be truthful. Honesty is the best policy you can instil in to them

• Do not jump into advising; first listen to what your teen has to say. Be empathetic.

• Your job during their teens is to spur and encourage them. If you are one who keeps criticizing, they are never going to want to communicate with you.

• You need to be available for them whenever they need you. They may want to talk in the middle of the night, it is important that you talk to them when they are willing to talk.

• If you are wrong, apologize. It takes a big person to apologize. Your teen will respect you much more for it.

• Don’t wait for your teen to ask you for help, sense it and then do your best to help them

• Respect your teen. Treat him/her like an adult. Give then their space.

• Remember to use words like “please”, “thank you” and “I love you” frequently with your teens.

One of the most common problems of children at school is bullying. Bullying can lead to many other problems. For instance, your children may want to start skipping school because of fear and anxiety. Bullying can lower your children’s self esteem. Some victims of bullies may feel depressed. Other victims develop aggressive behaviors toward other children. Bullying can range from verbally teasing to physically hitting.

Unfortunately, approximately ten percent of children are the victims of bullies. Children who are quiet, anxious, sensitive, or small are more vulnerable for bulling. Believe it or not, most victims of bullies will not seek help from the teacher or parents, because they may fear the bullies. Therefore, it is important for the parents to learn how to recognize the signs of the problem. For instance, some children constantly complain about being teased at school. Other children may tell you that they are sick all the time to avoid the school.

If you know that your children are bullied at school, what should you do? Although, parents in many movies encourage their children to fight back, it is not the best thing to do. Your children can get hurt, and they can be in trouble for fighting back. You should teach your children to walk away, and they should tell the bully to stop. The bullies need to understand that their behavior will not be tolerated. Tell you children to talk to teacher to help. If it still does not work, you should schedule a meeting with the other parents and teacher.

It is not always easy being a parent. We teach our children how to treat us. And often from an early age they have us wrapped around their small fingers.

So we are not unfairly taken advantage of we as parents must set boundaries early on. Without these our children will run wild. Today parents seem more lenient – certainly more so than our own parents. Too much freedom can actually harm our children.

By setting boundaries, we are letting our children know exactly what we expect of them. And what we disapprove of. Yes our children may very well kick and scream but it is in our own best interests (and theirs) to set boundaries and then consistently reinforce them.

Children feel safe when boundaries are set. Yes they will test you and you must be firm and unrelenting. Once you let your guard down once, you have lost some self respect and will be walked all over.

Setting boundaries for every routines are essential to ensure peaceful every-day living. Where your children can and cannot eat in the house. What time they must go to bed. How they are expected to behave are three general boundaries that must be set.

The trick in setting these rules is to not make them sound like rules. Explain why that particular boundary is set and why it is in their best interest. For example you can talk about their bed-time as being essential to have enough energy to wake up early the next morning and start playing.

State that so-and-so child goes to bed earlier than them and they are lucky to be able to stay up later than them. Tell your children stories about what it was like when you are their age. Children enjoy listening to these – especially when it makes them feel better about their circumstance.

Have consequences if they do not adhere to the boundary. And make sure you carry out what you threaten to do. That way your child knows you are serious and will think twice about pushing the boundary next time.

Being firm and loving is the key in setting and reinforcing boundaries with your child.

As children we were hopefully all taught the value of a dollar; that the amount of work we put in will determine our reward. But in a day and age where children seem more materialistic than ever, it can be increasingly difficult to instill the proper values in our children. There are several parenting tips that experts agree will go a long way to ensuring your child has an appropriate and healthy attitude towards money.

First and foremost, gift giving and receiving is one of childhood’s most important lessons. More and more children’s parties – abbreviated to fit into an hour and a half at a location away from home – have simply eliminated the tradition of opening presents in front of party guests. Sadly, this has also eliminated a truly priceless lesson for children.

Parenting tips of merit include offering your children a multitude of opportunities to give and receive gifts politely. Not only does this offer an invaluable lesson in social graces but it makes a significant point about the value of money. If children are involved in purchasing their friends’ gifts – including staying within a budgetary limit – they discover how much things really cost. Additionally they can witness firsthand how much joy the gift has given their friend.

Conversely, when your child receives a gift, they will be more inclined to express their appreciation for it because they realize what a short distance a dollar can stretch. They can learn to accept a present graciously – even if it’s not exactly what they wanted. The gift is in the thought not in the dollar value attached to it. This is one of the most important parenting tips in existence.

Additional parenting tips concerning the value of money include the attachment of values to everyday events. For example, a family outing does not have to be expensive to be worthwhile and fun. Teach your children the value of spending time together. Spending the day at a public park can be just as much fun as spending the day at a pricey amusement park.

Parenting tips that most experts agree upon include the importance of steering clear of monetary rewards attached to expected chores. Getting paid to make his/her bed will likely not teach your child any valuable lessons. Certain jobs around the house are expected – we all have to do our part to ensure that our homes run smoothly. Teach your children that your family is a unit that requires the effort of each team member for it to be successful. If you wish to offer chores above and beyond everyday household jobs at a set allowance then by all means do so. But keep one of the most important parenting tips in mind: paying your child to do what is already expected is looked at like a bribe and will ultimately not be valued.

But the greatest parenting tips that can be offered include the importance of listening to your child’s attitudes about money. You may be surprised by how your attitude has been passed seamlessly to your children. Value money and your children will value it as well.